That Fear of Fish

big_scary_fish   If you have been around me for the lasts 6 months, you will definitely have known of my irrational fear of fish. It’s really random, I know but I have some perfectly good reasons for it and here they are why I fear those fish in the tank.

1. Their eyes.

Have you seen those heartless, cruel eyes of fish. They are totally EMOTIONLESS. Dogs, cats, dolphins, even if they don’t speak you can see their emotions behind those big, dewey eyes. But fish? They HAVE NO EMOTION AT ALL. Just yesterday, when I came back home, I caught them staring at me through the glass of their tank. It was on. I glared right back at them, but they didn’t blink AT ALL. Fish are scary.

2. THEY ARE MATTER

Now, I know this might seem really weird and you might think to yourself, this girl needs to see the mental hospital. But hear me out. When you normally look at fish, they will be behind glass. It’s sorta like looking at a television screen in a sense. Your brain doesn’t register that they DO in fact occupy space. Oh sure, you know that they do occupy  space in theory but have you ever tried touching them? I was helping my sister clean the tank (this was before I developed my fear of fish) and this stupid fish kept struggling in the net! FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE, I WAS TRYING TO HELP. The net was moving. That was when I registered that fish did occupy space. At that moment, the fear of fish took root in my pure, innocent heart.

3. They are not civilised at all.

Dogs can be tamed, wild horses can be calmed, dolphins know who their human is. But do fish? No. They live for the pure reason of eating, sleeping, producing feces, and reproducing. For goodness’ sake, they eat their own offspring. They don’t even remember who they mated with, come to think of it, there are some humans like that but let’s not go there. At least dogs live in packs and have SOME meaning in life, but not fish. If you have food, you’re a friend. If you have a net, you’re an enemy. If you have both, you’re a friend.

4.You can’t tell one from another. 

I really don’t know. For some reason, this scares me a lot. They don’t have an identity and you can’t tell apart. This frustrates me, as although I do not have OCD, I’d  prefer to know which was the one who glared at me yesterday. Come to think of it they all glared at me. Never mind then.

5. Fish hate me.

This might be due to the fact I came up with punishments whenever they bullied each other. But those fish all died a long time ago (not because of my bullying punishments though), so its probably not because of that. Maybe I just have the face that fish hate. If that’s the case then the feeling’s mutual.

6. Fish do not have values.

None at all. If you are super nice to them and give them and extra serving of food, then you just smile at them, THEY RUN AWAY FROM YOU. What kind of gratitude is that? They also aren’t loyal at all. Trust me, I would know.

7.  They are fish.

They are fish. Enough said.

Yeah, those are the perfectly logical reasons that cultivated my irrational fear of fish. If you think I’m joking, I’m really not.     >-< Fish legitly scare me. Whenever I walk past the tank at my grandma’s house, I just know that they are planning to kill me soon. Don’t ever trust a fish. Never.

*I don’t own that picture*

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